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Jew-Hating Rabbit! |
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Cute Bunny Rabbit Will 'Eat the Jews'By Keith Rottweiler February 13, 2008, Beirut--His name is Assud the Rabbit, and he will eat you and your children--if you're a Jew! The Lebanese "Assud"--which translates as "lions"--is a creation of the Hamas terror organization and is being deployed as a measure to help restore the Palestinians to their homeland. The show that features the darling rabbit, Tomorrow’s Pioneers, first became known for its jew-killer Mickey Mouse look-alike character, Farfur. Unfortunately, Farfur was murdered by Israelis and was subsequently replaced by Nahoul the Bee, who also was killed off when the Jews prevented him from leaving Gaza for medical treatment. The program featuring cuddly Assud ends with a cute little terrorist hostess leading everyone in a cute song of terror: "We will never recognize Israel.... [we will] liberate our homeland from the Zionist filth." "After Assud is martyred, we will create another cuddly jew-killer," said a Hamas spokesman disguised as Porky Pig. "Copyrights be damned! It is the will of Allah!" Reportedly, evil Jews in Israel have asked the Jew-loving U.S. State Department for help. A Pentagon source has said that Uno the Beagle, who won Best in Show at last night's Westminster Dog Show, will be asked to sniff-out Assud the rabbit. Macey the Akita, who also participated in last night's dog show, will perform the actual kill.
The elderly Wile E. Coyote, long-retired but still active, is expected to accompany the canine commandos on this dangerous mission in an advisory capacity. Elmer Fudd asked to be involved but was refused. "He hates rabbits too much," said the Pentagon source. "It's way too personal for him. And, frankly, as much as we appreciate his offer, Mister Fudd hasn't had much success at killing rabbits." Reminded that Coyote was unsuccessful in his efforts to kill the Roadrunner, the source said, "Roadrunners are way harder to catch and kill than rabbits." |
Uno the Beagle "to the rescue"
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Humor & Satire |
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