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Barack 'Not a Fighter,'
Says Hillary; Hillary 'A Racist' Counters Barack By Duane
Wordsworth
February 17, 2008, Oshkosh--In a statement calculated to
infuriate her opponent, Hillary Clinton called Barack Obama "a chicken."
"We all know that Barack can talk," Clinton said in a speech
to a group of fortyish women at the
Badger State Trailer Park. "We all know Barack can make wonderful
speeches before friendly crowds. But we need a president who's a
fighter, not just a talker. Barack is not a fighter. He won't
debate me, he won't fight me, he's a chicken."
"It's the same old thing, the same old Clinton race-bating politics,"
Obama campaign manager David Pouffle said in response to Clinton's statement.
"We all know what 'chicken' really means. It's been well documented
that the Clintons are racists, and here they go again with the
name-calling. Well, we won't be drawn in to that sort of rhetoric.
We're trying to stay positive, and yes, there are lots of names we could
use to describe Hillary and her rapist, intern-f-----g husband, but we're
just not going to do it. We're not going to go there."
"Every African-American knows that 'chicken' is code for 'n----r,'" said
Obama early this morning before a crowd gathered at Ben's Soul Food
Emporium in Milwaukee, the only soul food restaurant in the state.
"Well, I've got something to say to Hillary. I like chicken,
but don't call me one."
The restaurant crowd responded to Obama's statement with wild cheering
and one patron fainting, the fiftieth such documented
fainting spell of Obama's campaign.
"I warned her earlier, " Obama went on, warming up to the crowd.
"I said I may be skinny, but I'm tough. I'm wirey. Don't mess
with me, because I ain't no chicken, but I am a fighter. I'll kick
that bitch's ass all the way from here back to Washington."
Obama then led the crowd in chanting, "I ain't no chicken, I ain't no
chicken . . ."
Following the impromptu speech, Obama was taken away by
his handlers as he shouted "I have a dream!" and "Bring it on, bitch!
You're f-----g with the wrong n----r!" He then began to recite a
Langston Hughes poem as several more people in the crowd fainted.
The News Lampoon
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